#ShitMyCoworkerSays: April 24 – 28

Delete! Delete! Delete!

I think I’m really going to enjoy working at my new job because I can bank all of the dumb shit my coworkers say and lay it out for you on Office Ranter. Come to think of it, my new job is a gold mine.
 
UPDATE: If you read my post from last week, I’m happy to announce that another Canadian was hired, although for a different department.
 
Anyway, moving on to this week’s #ShitMyCoworkerSays post. And as always I want to hear your stories and rants. Send submissions to officeranter16@gmail.com. Please and thank you.
 
SCENARIO 1
 
Context: Three days into my new job, I felt I could peg who the micro managers were, regardless of title, by the way they hovered over peers and barked orders like the stick up their butt holes were causing splinters. But there was one colleague who surprised me. Hierarchy-wise, she was on the same level as me. She appeared “normal” and was really easy to talk to. There was one time I asked her where I could find certain documents. She came over to my desk to show me the pathway and she mentioned that she sent me an email with an article that pertained to my current project. I took a look at it, bookmarked the article, then deleted the email. BIG MISTAKE!
Continue reading “#ShitMyCoworkerSays: April 24 – 28”

Dumb Comment of the Week!


On days when unicorns are galloping across a rainbow and dropping tiny nuggets of gold into your lap, you make unicorn lemonade – such as with the above gem.
 
A friend who works for a mall management company, sent this to me and we both wondered if the person who emailed this to them is a special snowflake.
 
He appears to be a full-grown adult because he’s using, what I would assume, his own money to purchase jeans. But to be so grossed out by someone’s breath, really? Have you never took a whiff of your own shit before? I would say the smell of poop is worse than bad breath.
 
And what exactly do you want the mall management team to do? Hand out breath mints to the store’s employees? The mall has zero control over who the store’s hire. And dude, perhaps first contact the actual store and deal with it head on if it bothers you that much.
 
You don’t actually give any descriptors to identify this employee. You weakly call someone out and expect what in return exactly? If you already know the pair of jeans you want, go into the store, and if the employee who helped you is there, find another employee to work with you. If there isn’t another one, tell the employee the jeans you want, pay for it, and be on your way. The whole transaction could take less than 10 minutes.
 
Is bad breath that scary to you that you need to travel somewhere else for the pair of jeans you want?

Men Who Throw Tantrums in the Workplace Get Rewarded

Ugh, men!

I came across this THR report yesterday over Paramount’s negotiations with Mel Gibson‘s Braveheart budget. Apparently, the studio’s initial offer was lower than Mel’s expectations for what he would need to shoot the film. So, during a meeting with Paramount, when he was told how much money they were willing to put up, Mel went nuclear, as he usually does:

Gibson was furious. “He grabbed a large glass ashtray and threw it through the wall,” recalls agent Jeff Berg. “He threw the ashtray through the wall!”
 
The actor-director confirmed the incident. “I was like, ‘What the f-ck do you people mean? I turned down three jobs — blah, blah, blah.’ I was kind of upset, probably a little over the top. It was all posturing bullsh-t.”
 
A week later, Paramount revised its offer, putting up one-third of the budget and taking a lower distribution fee.
 
The way I read the anecdote, it’s being told as a success story. Especially the way the piece ends, like this:
 
Braveheart would go on to win five Oscars, including best picture and best director nods for Gibson.

The way it’s postured here is that Mel fought for the film. And it was his commitment and passion that got him to produce the iconic movie.
 
But he THREW AN ASHTRAY THROUGH A WALL during a business meeting and he was immediately rewarded with more money. THE F-CK!
Continue reading “Men Who Throw Tantrums in the Workplace Get Rewarded”

#ShitMyCoworkerSays: April 16 – 21

What the f-ck!

Like bosses, coworkers also say dumb shit. And the more people you work with, the number of dumb words spoken goes up – exponentially.
 
I’m happy to document it all with #ShitMyCoworkerSays and I want to hear your stories, too. Send submissions to officeranter16@gmail.com. Please and thank you.
 
SCENARIO 1
 
Context: On my first day at my new job, myself and the “racist white lady” were invited out to lunch to meet our new department mates. When you meet them, it’s clear that our new work mates are an international bunch. So what does “racist white lady” say the moment she sits down at the table before getting to know anyone?
Continue reading “#ShitMyCoworkerSays: April 16 – 21”

Etiquette is Dead: When My Real Name Brings Out the Casual Racist in You

Really? C’mon!

Sorry for the two-month radio silence, Ranters. I was looking for a new job because I felt my 9 to 5 gig was making me dumber. I’m happy to announce that as of last week, I’m working somewhere new and it will put my brain power to the test. I’ll spill the new job details in a future post because I want to dedicate today to something that’s been on my mind since I started my new job.
Continue reading “Etiquette is Dead: When My Real Name Brings Out the Casual Racist in You”

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter

Happy Easter!
 
I won’t be ranting today because my mouth is full of chocolate. So, I leave you with the two cutest bunnies alive.

Am I Bitch For Not Donating Money to Your Kid’s Fundraiser?

BITCH!
BITCH!

Sorry, but I don’t want to donate money to your husband’s hockey fundraiser or your kid’s school this year or any year. It’s not because I can’t afford it, but it’s because I find it all too invasive and impersonal. It makes for some awkward conversation when you’re standing across my desk and shoving the donation box in my face, but won’t leave my office when I’ve clearly indicated that I’m not interested in donating.
 
To me, the work place is not the place or environment to be asking for money of any kind. Call me a skeptic, but how do I know the fundraiser is legit and not used as a front to pay for the vacation that we all know you will be going on next week?
 
Plus, some people can’t afford it and don’t want to be put on the spot like they’re they bad guy for not shelling out the money they earned.
 
What would you do in this case? Any advice on how to respond diplomatically?